Thurs, Nov 29 at Woody's
Once. Twice. Three times a lady. At Woody’s Czarina contest, judged by Smirnoff vodka reps (who drink beer all night), Brooke Lynn Hytes wins her third crown in three months. Is there no stopping her? Interestingly, because Czarina happens so soon after the Miss El Convento Rico contest and since many outside the gay community judge Czarina, those who entered Rico’s contest recycle their performances at this one. With slight changes, Keira Keys, Vitality Black and yes, even Brooke Lynn, enter with the same fantastic numbers. Other entrants, like Robyn DeCradle, Demand Attention, Scarlett Bobo and Bunni Lapin don’t seem to stand a chance. Mina, however, makes a well-thought-out comeback performance, spraying herself with her own Smirnoff body spray. Tynomi Banks’s unmatched choreographed Nicki Minaj number competes against Honey Brown’s futuristic rendition of ’90s Euro house. Devine Darlin, meanwhile makes her own Smirnoff Twisted on stage, and Nikki Chin chugs back a Smirnoff Rocket with her straight brother. Nikki swallows faster. Her throat’s wider.
Thurs, Nov 29 at Distillery District
Once you’ve done things a little differently you might as well do things a whole lot differently. Such is the case at tonight’s Greta Constantine fashion show. Most designers follow the same schedule lorded over by Toronto Fashion Week. Greta ‘s Kirk Pikersgill and Stephen Wong however have always shunned this dictatorship and in the past have held their shows about a week off standard. This time they decide to strut way left by showing their line a whole two months later. Not everyone can pull this off. But with their moneyed backers and many followers they can set their own path. And tonight the path leads to The Fermenting Cellar in The Distillery District. Inside a pot potpourri of fresh Fashionatti mingle about before the show gets underway. Gorgeous Ashley MacIntyre is busy chatting, Spiro Mandylor is busy scoping, Keith Richardson is busy posing and Anita Clarke is busy in an animated conversation with April Wozny about things best left unsaid. With three vodka cocktails named in their honour, the drinks are flowing; The Kirk, The Stephen and The Greta. Whatever happened to the Ezra? I’m thirsty for some of that. But I’ll make do with what’s about to strut down the winding runway. And out the models pop, through a rusty metal door, like full-term offspring in the latest spring things. Beginning in bold black then virginal white, the collection is much more structured that before. Yes, of course they have the wondrous Wong draping, but flirty poufy skirts, oversized wrapped bows and bold square shouldered jackets have been added to this years collection. The latter being perfect for the diva businesswoman who wants to own the boardroom. Work? Werk!
Thurs, Dec 6 at AGO
Once they’ve done the first 1st Thursday at the AGO, you know they’re going to do it again. This one is a raging success. It’s the opportunity to sip cocktails with a stylish set while enjoying music, priceless art and performances — like Nina Arsenault in all her glory. When we enter her performance space, we see photos of Nina projected across four walls. In the middle she sits surrounded by personal objects, including note pads, syringes, skulls and sketches, like artifacts chronicling the living exhibit we are witnessing. Which is a completely naked, smudge-covered transsexual in creepy Joker-ish makeup frantically riding an exercise bike while singing along to music and flogging herself with a leather whip. Considering that Nina prides herself on always looking gorgeous, to see her like this, and to see her penis for the first time, is a bit startling. And a bit life-altering. Girl’s got balls. Actually no, she doesn’t have those anymore.
Sat, Dec 8th at Church on Church
Once in a while it seems everyone who is someone is out and about. Tonight is just that and they’ve all converged on Gairy Brown’s Saturday night party, Salvation at Church. Not to only to worship but to give thanks. Thanks to DJ Alain Jackinsky for playing a devilishly good set including some of my favourite all-time circuit anthems of the past. Thanks to DJ Jamal for never letting us down. Thanks to DJ Cesar for giving me an on-the-floor educational session in beats . . . again. Thanks to a certain promoter (who doesn’t wish to be named and should be at his own party) who is here doing “research.” Thanks to a certain employee (who doesn’t dare be named) of another bar and should be working but decides to play hookie and dance like a hooker on the dance floor. Thanks to Church bartender for providing such attentive service. Thanks to Dave Flynn former co-owner of the 5ive Nightclub for providing some crazy parties of my past. Thanks to Russell Palloo former manager of The Barn Nightclub for providing some fully messy parties of my past. Thanks to Gaelen Patrick former manager of Fly nightclub for providing some past late night drama of my past. Thanks to everyone for dressing up, even if it’s just because you’ve all come from the Gentleman’s Christmas Party at The Carlu. And thanks to Gairy for bringing us all together, like twelve dancing disciples, for a liquid last supper. Who wants some more bloody wine?