Cup of Joe

Let me confirm something you already knew: Joe Manganiello is irresistible. Forget that his body looks like it was engineered in the future and sent back to pleasure and destroy us all. And that he makes anyone he shares a photograph with look like a fat pre-teen (trust me: I learned the hard way). Also, that he combines Clark Gable’s charm with the earthy machismo of a gladiator and the unassuming goofiness of your favourite straight drinking buddy. Most importantly: I have never met a heterosexual man more chill about being objectified. My many compliments about his body are met with a nonchalant “Thank you,” as if I had said, “Hey, this is a delicious sandwich you just made me.” You probably know him as Alcide on True Blood, but this summer he single-thong-edly steals the show as Big Dick Richie in Magic Mike.

Andrew Johnston: I am here with the physically repulsive Joe Manganiello.

Do you ever get to a gym?

Joe Manganiello: If you knew what I ate for lunch yesterday . . .

What did you eat?

Mac and cheese, fried chicken and onion rings.

If I had your body, I would be naked all the time.

I try to be naked as much as I can.

Do you ever get self-conscious?

Well, when you’re wearing an American flag thong with a strategically placed sparkler, I mean sure.

Well, you shouldn’t be.

Thank you!

Oh, you’re welcome. Obviously, anyone who’s seen True Blood knows you’ve aired the goods before . . .

That’s a very diplomatic way of putting it.

But was this your first time in front of a live audience?

Well, I did a play with full frontal nudity when I was in college, so that was maybe daunting. [Editor’s note: I wish to fuck I saw that.]

It seems that a lot of the nudity on True Blood is very sexual, which is the exact opposite of this movie, where it was almost done for comedic effect.

When you have a woman’s face and you’re grinding your junk against it, I’d say that’s pretty sexualized. I mean, anything involving a penis pump . . .

About that: one of the most memorable scenes involves you, an appendage and a pump. Was that actually you?

That was me.

Wow, that was actually your dick . . .

[AJ becomes girlishly flustered.]

I was expecting a stunt penis, but good for you! If body parts could win Oscars, I’d nominate your bulge for Best Actor and Matthew McConaughey’s taint for Best Supporting.

I think there should be two new categories this year.

Was this the first time you’d done choreography?

I did Oklahoma in high school, but aside from that, I’ve done a lot of fight scenes and they’re kind of similar. Except instead of somebody getting beat up, in Magic Mike somebody’s getting . . . [Joe starts gyrating in his seat; it’s almost too much to handle.]   

Were the cast and production people conscious of the film having a gay following?

Oh sure! Of course! I come from True Blood, and there’s a built-in following from that — the Logo channel in the States gave me an award two years ago. And I spoke this past year at the Human Rights Campaign, so I’m very active with my gay fan base.

Well, I think they owe it to you to see this movie.

They’re gonna love it.

Oh, they will.

Andrew Johnston would gladly play the role of Joe’s thong in Magic Mike, The Sequel.
Check out Fab TV to see Andrew's interview in full and in the flesh!