Dolly Parton’s altered yet angelic face, Christina Aguilera’s mountainous bleached blonde wigs and Angelina’s spindly right leg teach us that sometimes one must make do with what one’s got. As is the case with Toronto’s mid-winter music festival — Slacker Canadian Music Week. It’s March, the weather sucks and everyone has a cold, but hell, there are buttloads of bands making very good music right now. Here is a rundown of the festival’s gayest artists.

who: Nneka (from Nigeria and Hamburg)
what: This Afro-German warrior-princess of soul has been compared to Lauryn Hill, has done a song with Nas and is adored by Lenny Kravitz. R&B with crazy beat loops,
brains and reggae twists.go see this if: You like music with a message and a groove.
avoid this if: You want brainless hip-hop about a$$.
fun fact: She faced down the Nigerian military in a triumphant homecoming tour. 
where: Friday, March 23 @ The Mod Club


who: Young Empires (from Toronto)
what: NME loves them and calls the quartet “master weavers of future disco.” They call their style “haute rock.” go see this if: You’re a fan of Cut Copy, Empire of the Sun, dreamy dance music with guitars, and songs that
project sunshine through the medium of musical notes.
avoid this if: You can’t handle choruses with a lot of “oh oh ohs” and “whoa oh oh ohhhhhhs.”
fun fact: They actually use a Peruvian pan flute.
where: Wednesday, March 21 @ The Great Hall









who: Housse de Racket (from Paris)
what: Think Daft Punk meets Phoenix and goes nouveau-rock. Big beats, French-house synths and an ’80s rock aesthetic — it’s an epic new dance sound.go see this if: You don’t mind the odd French lyric and strange new dance music that’s so infectious it jump-starts your head, shoulders, knees and toes.
avoid this if: You are not attracted to devilishly handsome Frenchmen or the ’80s in general.
fun fact: Their favourite fictional heroes are Asterix and Obelix.
where: Saturday, March 24 @ The Wrongbar

 

who: Top Less Gay Love Tekno Party (from Vancouver)
what: Making internet searches for music fun all over again, the members of this electro quintet describe themselves as hooker pop, or the sound that results from “Dolce & Gabbana having sex with Gucci.” go see this if: You like live shows involving costumes, Silly String, glitter, makeup and instantly likeable high-energy dance pop. (NB: even though this is just a DJ set, the band promises to spin new songs and throw things.)
avoid this if: You don’t have a heartbeat.
fun fact: These guys have an odd obsession/fictitious relationship with Chad Kroeger.
where: Thursday, March 22 @ The Piston







who: Eric Solomon (from Montreal and Vancouver)
what: Dance-pop with big fat funk twists.go see this if: You’re a fan of huge synths, soul-soaked voices and party anthems with more smarts than your average top-40 mush.
avoid this if: You don’t like to dance.
fun fact: He grew up in the Congo.
where: Friday, March 23 @ The Hoxton

Slacker Canadian Music Week runs Wed, March 21-Sun, Mar 25 at various locations. cmw.net

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